being a friend doesn’t mean we have to speak all the time. it doesn’t mean we have to see each other every day because life constantly gets in the way of too many of the things we want to do. being a friend means i’m going to be here for you when you need me whether it’s in 3 hours or 3 years. i’m going to be here.
^ One of the most important things to learn.
I get on here and I read all the things that I vented about and most of them revolve around you. You were an unexpected event in my life but it turned out great. We made memories and we had fun doing it. I got mad at you all the time because you deserved it. But ever since Thanksgiving you changed. Don’t get me wrong, I understand that people change but you didn’t change in a good way.
You pushed everyone away. You became a hardened person that didn’t even smile anymore and oh how I loved that smile. I miss it dearly. You became busy and anti-social and never had time for anything. You became snappy even with friends. And worst of all, you had the nerve to tell me that “apparently we weren’t as good as friends as i thought we were.” Really? Because from where I’m standing having sleepovers, taking trips, paying for each other, going to movies, taking naps at each other’s places, being silly together, seeing each other on a regular basis, and much more points to being pretty good friends. But hey, that’s just me. Also, the time when I called you and I really needed you that night and you told me that you would be there for me in the future but that you were tired and wanted to go to bed. I was crying on the phone and I don’t cry, not to people. You told me that you would be there for me in the future but what future Marcus? You are leaving; you won’t be here. I think what hurt the most was knowing that even when you said that you would be there in the future, I knew you were lying and that hurt worse than you not being there for me in that moment. It hurt that you made an excuse and then told a lie but hey, I guess I should be used that from you by now.
Yeah, I’m not thrilled with the choices you are making or the fact that you are leaving, but you are a grown up and you make your own choices. I’m not afraid to voice how I feel because you have to make the choices that you think best for you. However, if you just leave the rest of your life behind for this one reason, I’m going to have to tell you that I think it’s stupid. Never put all your eggs in one basket. Never make someone your everything.
I have had so much stress over you because I guess I thought you were worth fighting for but now I’m starting to question my own judgement. I’m not saying I shouldn’t have worked for what I wanted but maybe i should have given up sooner.
I’m not good at goodbyes. In fact, they are one of the hardest things for me to do, especially when it isn’t by my choice. I’ve already had to say goodbye to you once when I came back home from school and that nearly took a piece of my heart (and that was even knowing I would see you in a couple weeks one more time), I don’t know if I can handle saying goodbye again. If I couldn’t deal with the first one, how will I be able to deal with the second one? The permanent one.
However, there are a few things I would ask of you. First off, don’t just cut me out of your life. Secondly, be here for my birthday. Last but not least, smile again Marcus. Because of everything I feel that is the one thing that I miss the most. I miss your smile. It’s a great smile. So Marcus, just please find a way to smile again.
Exactly how I feel with Marcus. Just insert Chicago instead.
A random ball pit is set up in the middle of a city
And this is what happens as people approach it.
That was awesome.
This made my day and I cried, no shame.
Emily, you cry at everything.
and how did you say your internet addiction started?
THIS GAME WAS THE BEST THING THAT EVER HAPPENED TO ME AS A CHILD OMFG